...I knew that would get your attention. ;o) Here's one of those substantive posts I talk about but never seem to write.
I've known it for a while. I have a problem. If there were a form of rehab for people like me, I'd be there in an instant. It's a very serious problem.
"What is this problem?" you ask. It's really very simple. I have a VERY unfortunate tendancy to fall in love with fictional characters. It happens to some extent with almost every "romantic" book I read. I have daydreams about the heros and spend weeks looking for guys who look how I think each hero should look, just so I can have a clearer mental picture of them. I mix up facial features, hair, and voices, until I have THE PERFECT picture in my head. By that time, I'm probably finished with yet another book and start the process over again. I almost always spend a day or so detesting the heroine who gets the man, and I just know I could have done things way better than she did. Naturally, if I were in her position there wouldn't have been any misunderstandings or quarrels, and the whole thing would have gone much more smoothly. (This is the part where people who know me well are supposed to roll their eyes.)
There are some books and characters that are far worse than others, though the details differ. Every time I read Pride and Prejudice I want to BE Elizabeth. I've never hated her for anything. And what girl wouldn't want to end up with *sigh* Mr. Darcy??
The first time I read Anya Seton's Katharine I spent a few months "in love" with John of Gaunt. That is highly inconvenient, seeing as he's been dead 600+ years. I didn't like him as much the last time I read that book, so I think I'm pretty well over that.
By far the worst, as I'm sure my friends can attest to, is reading the Anne books. Just reading the books over (and over) again is silly of me, because I know what will happen. Every time I read them, I turn silly, overly romantic, and more than slightly dissatisfied with life in modern Midwestern America. (And I end up writing posts like this.) The biggest problem is that I have "been in love with" the hero, Gilbert Blythe since I was 11. To this day, if you were to ask me to describe my dream man, he would match up almost exactly with Gilbert.
This is where detesting the heroine comes in. I always end up wanting to throttle Anne, not just because she's silly and messes things up, but out of jealousy. How ridiculous is that? I dislike her because if it were all real and I was part of the story, she'd STILL be silly and mess everything up and she'd STILL get her man.
All of this may explain why I'm 19 years old and have never had a boyfriend, or anyone even close to a boyfriend. I'm hopelessly romantic and I read too many silly books. At the same time, I know full well how silly and unrealistic I'm being. I laugh at and make fun of myself for it. But I can't help it.